Does Food Taste Good To Dementia Patients?

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Alzheimer patients often have different preferences for foods that they might of had before the disease came on. Their tastes can change slowly or abruptly as the disease progresses, but either way, it is disturbing to the caretaker. That is the case with my mother and it put me into a tailspin, worrying that she wasn’t getting the proper nutrition.

Now when you think about it, that’s a crazy thought because they are still adults, right? They really are not 5 year old children who haven’t tasted certain foods. They’ve had a lifetime of eating and tasting creating their preferences for certain foods and a dislike for others. It’s their right not to eat what they don’t have a taste for…they don’t like it…it doesn’t taste good to them. We are all different…right? Food should taste good, right?

cookie monsterWell, it turns out that Alzheimer patients taste buds change as they progress into the disease. What they liked yesterday is not necessarily what they will like today or tomorrow or the next day…their tastes change. With that, it stresses out the caregiver because we are there to do the right thing for our parents. After all, we are THEIR parents now and they must listen to us because we know better…. Heck, we love to eat broccoli and spaghetti with sauce with parmesan cheese on top and my Mom used to like it too…so why doesn’t she like it now?  Why is she not eating her cookies anymore, raiding the cookie jar every time I turn my head? I once called her the cookie monster. I also used to give her medication with pudding or yogurt and the other day she spit it out…at me…. with a sour puss on her face. I insisted that it tastes fine…and that she’s been taking her pills like that for a long time with no problem…so why now is she acting so vile? Because their tastes change as they progress into the disease…finally, I got it!

Last week, I found Teepa Snow who teaches and lectures on the behaviors of Alzheimer’s patients. She educates caregivers, while explaining how the Alzheimer’s afflicted person is experiencing their disease. I found her lectures amazingly informative, feeling that any caregiver would benefit from viewing her videos. She has a website and her other videos are also found on: https://www.youtube.com/. The first video that I listened to, I posted on the Boomerang-parent’s Facebook page. Here is the link to Teepa’s video that I first listened to that finally made sense to me: http://www.alzheimersweekly.com/2014/05/sweet-food-bitter-pills-dementia.html

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Teepa says that their taste of sour and bitter becomes stronger than before…therefore they start putting more sugar in coffee, eat more sweets, etc. She gives all sorts of scenarios that all caretakers face with dementia patients. She suggests that crushing their pills in apple sauce is the worst thing you could do because it makes the already bitter pills, more bitter in the apple sauce. She says that jam would be the better choice to get them to take their meds. Also, did you know that putting crushed meds in pudding or yogurt really doesn’t work either…not really…because of the smooth texture. Makes them want to spit it out because they feel the crushed pills in their mouth…which my mother actually did. Why didn’t I think of that…..? There is so much more in this video, including humor…a lot of light-hearted humor…definitely worth the watch.

It all became so clear and understandable…of course….why didn’t I see that before? Probably because I was in the middle of the situation with blinders on. It makes so much sense…and I felt relieved having seen it. Finally something that explains what is happening before my very eyes. I may not like it, but it’s the facts Ma’me. Teepa gives very good suggestions on how to get around the altered taste buds and as glad I am to know that now…I wish that I could have seen her video last summer in 2014 where I could have applied it to my Mother’s symptoms. I could have made her life so much easier if I knew these simple facts, and would have saved myself a heap of worrying. Hopefully, I can help to pass this info on to others.

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Home Health Aides For Dementia Patients Can Be a Wonderful Thing

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Taking care of a parent with Alzheimer’s disease or dementia can be very challenging and also exhausting for the caretaker. I was many years into it before I realized that I needed the help of a Home Health Aide. I was lucky, the first timeout of the gate with Cardine. She was the first Home Health Aide that was send to help with my mother suffering with dementia. She became my hero very quickly.

When first taking on a parent with dementia, we go through so many different feelings and experiences, that often leaves our heads spinning and feeling frustrated all at the same time. Many of us don’t have a healthcare background or any resources at our fingertips to help us cope and make sense of the situation that unfolds before our eyes on a daily basis. Really, we are flying blindly into the path of the oncoming train, sometimes, not understanding what’s ahead.

When I first took on my mother, after moving into my house from her California apartment, I noticed a few little things, but like we all do, it’s brushed off as “oh, she’s just getting older”. After awhile the symptoms get worse and we know that something is very wrong. After we seek a diagnosis, we start our journey into the unknown with our loved one. Life for your parent will never be the same and for you also. It’s almost like when you become a first time parent, changing your life forever, only this time it’s with an unhappy prognosis.

For years I took care of Mom and we went through all of the different stages that most dementia patients and caretakers go through, paranoia, accusations, hiding their belongings, aggressiveness, depression, sadness, incontinence, denial, lack of interest in daily hygiene, preoccupation in trying to make sense of paperwork, confusion, wandering, getting lost, looking for her mother, loss of words and substitution of words, etc. There were so many more things that I went through with her, and since we are all living individual experiences, I’m sure others have gone through even different things that I know nothing of. My situation with Mom, finally came to a point where I could no longer leave her alone while I was at work because she was a safety hazard to herself and others. That’s when I started researching and got the social workers involved, finally getting on the right track in finding a Home Health Aide for Mom.

mom-cardineIt was a long road to learning what to do in order to get help at home, but through Mom’s doctor, who had earlier applied for the Visiting Nurse Service to come to give her B12 shots every month, I was introduced to the social workers of that organization. Since her condition was becoming a safety issue, we discussed our options through meetings and house calls. Of course, I couldn’t afford to go out and hire a Home Health Aide on my salary, so I was naturally feeling very stressed on how to bring help in. Working was something that I must do in order to survive, it’s not debatable as with so many caretakers in the same situation these days. It’s a huge dilemma for all involved.

Needless to say, we found a way and soon thereafter, Cardine arrived. She was the best thing that had every happened to us since Mom came to live with me. We were so lucky to have her as she was experienced, compassionate, concerned and very good at her job. She was mentally present at all times, always putting my Mother’s best interest first. I was very relieved that we were so fortunate to have found her.

Cardine had 12 hour shifts, 5 days a week making it possible to commute to my job and keep the roof over our heads. She would take care of every need that my Mother had, personal hygiene, meals, bathing, companionship, arts and crafts, interaction and keeping her mind engaged and active. She was a one woman band and a rock star in her profession. While I was at work, I was absolutely sure that my demented Mom was in good hands and also safe at home. She wasn’t lonely, and she was content and well taken care of. What more could I ask for?

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Photos: (1) Cardine on Mom’s 86th birthday, (2) Cardine drying Mom’s hair after a shampoo, (3) Cardine and Mom, Eleanor Van Meter doing puzzles together.

Home Health Aides are a wonderful choice for your loved one.

Bottom line for me, Home Health Aides are a wonderful choice for your loved one. If you can find the right fit through an agency, it will change your world and that of your parent.

 They will make the quality of life for the patient and the caretaker better, giving more time to enjoy with your loved one. If you find yourself in this situation, reach out to a social worker through agencies in your area. Reach out to the Alzheimer’s Association who can advise you further. Call the physician caring for your parent, who can open many doors. Although it may be different for others, In my experience, if you don’t ask them, they won’t offer any open channels for help in the home. You must present your needs and concerns to make it known that it is a safety issue. They will then advise what avenues and options are open to you. There are ways to provide a loved one with a Home Health Aide if you are financially unable.

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How To Speak To A Person With Dementia

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Taking care of a loved one when they are suffering from Alzheimer’s disease or dementia is a very challenging task as we all know. It’s probably one of the hardest things that you will ever have to do in your lifetime, but it is also a monumental accomplishment.

In the beginning, you will notice small things like forgetfulness and little things that might seem like unusual behavior, but even then, you might brush it off as a result of stress or being over scheduled. When the episodes become more frequent and you find yourself standing there scratching your head, because you know that there is something very real happening to them. Instinctively, you know, that life will never be the same for you or them.

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(Photos) (1) Eleanor Van Meter with her grandmother. So young and pretty! (2) Eleanor, Mom, with my father, Edward Brophy on a boat, somewhere, appearing to be enjoying themselves…with her whole life ahead of her. Who knew what the future would bring?

The behaviors, of course can vary with each individual, but many of the behaviors, I have found strangely enough, to be identical to other patients suffering from this disease, leading me to believe that the same part of the brain is effected in all patients at this stage of the disease. As in the case with my mother, Eleanor Van Meter, as she started into her journey with dementia, I found that she would be very paranoid. She would always be hiding things and then forgetting where she hid them. When she couldn’t recall where she hid them, she would make a beeline straight for me, accusing me of everything under the sun. I’d be sitting at the computer in my kitchen, where I normally would be on a Sunday afternoon, and she would shuffle in with a puss on her face a mile long and fury in her eyes, heading straight over to me. “Where are my credit cards, where are my medical cards? You took them, I know that you did…you were always a rotten kid, I should have never had you, you little shit.” The first time that happened, I was completely taken off guard, immediately I felt hurt because of her words and then I became defensive while declaring loudly that I never touched her things…I wouldn’t do that. In the beginning, I didn’t know how to handle this, knowing that I didn’t steal anything, but at the same time not knowing how to speak with her about it so as to not fuel the fire making it worse. Actually, in the beginning, you are so taken off guard, you are not thinking of anything except defending yourself and your honor against their harsh words. That train of thought would soon would change…

Through the school of hard knocks, I learned first hand, that arguing with someone who has dementia is an argument that you will never win. Never, never, never, ever try to argue with your loved one with dementia. You will NEVER win…EVER! They have a way of going around and around and in the end, you will be so frustrated that you will want to cry or explode, whichever comes first. So, how do we speak with our demented parents in that situation? I came to learn, first and foremost, be calm, speak softly, slowly and with compassion about them having lost their things. There is nothing that you can say that will make them believe that they hid it somewhere, forgetting where they put it. They can’t remember that little fact. They only remember where the object always resided before. Their brains are not working correctly anymore and certainly not in the way yours works. They honestly believe that you stole their things….because they certainly wouldn’t have moved anything themselves.

It’s important to sympathize with their loss and that the missing object will probably turn up, and how sorry you are that they can’t find it. Chances are, they won’t believe a word you are saying, but at least in the end, you know that you spoke with them in a loving way and that you tried not to upset them any more than they already are. Validating their feelings and their loss will only help the situation and you stand a better chance of calming them down and snapping them out of the dementia attack.

You might want to try and change the conversation to something else, such as I used to do with my mother. In hard times such as this, I would ask her if she would like to listen to Pavarotti, her favorite singer. She would always agree and we’d go back into her room and I’d pop the cd into the player, she would sit there listening as if she was in a trance, forgetting about her earlier concerns. This was usually the best part of her day and I was happy to see the peaceful look on her face once again as she appeared to almost be floating on every note that Pavarotti was singing. That was heaven on earth to her.

Funny thing, most times when my mother snapped out of a dementia attack, after accusing me of stealing things, later, she would always come to me and apologize. 

I would ask her, you remember acting that way? She would say yes…I can’t seem to stop once it starts. I always found that amazing…it was living proof to me that she was very aware that there was something very wrong with her.

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